Sunday, April 6, 2025

Creating Space

The soft hum of the house felt almost like a lullaby, a comforting backdrop to the busy life I was trying to build after everything had changed. Anthony’s laughter echoed down the hall as he played with his toys, completely unaware of the subtle shifts happening around him. Doc and I had made a decision. It was one of those things you don’t talk about directly, but you know is necessary for everyone’s well-being.

We had hired two night-time nannies, a couple of wonderful women who were experienced and kind-hearted. They would take the late shifts, allowing Doc and I some time for ourselves. Time to reconnect, to rebuild not just as parents but as partners. The kind of time that we hadn’t had since Anthony was born, a time when intimacy didn’t have to be snuck into quiet moments but could be fully embraced.

It had been a struggle at first. The idea of giving someone else responsibility for Anthony during the night felt like a betrayal—especially after everything we had been through. But Doc was patient, understanding, and always willing to listen. And over time, we both realized the importance of finding balance. Our relationship needed to survive and grow, not just as co-parents, but as lovers, friends, and partners.

Tonight was the first night the nannies were scheduled to take over. They arrived just after dinner, friendly and professional, their calm demeanor instantly easing any lingering worries I had. Anthony took to them quickly, his bright smile lighting up his face as he reached for his toys, eager to show them the new game he'd learned.

After settling in, I turned to Doc. “Are you sure about this?” I asked quietly. The question wasn’t about the nannies; it was about us. About the vulnerability of creating a space for just the two of us.

Doc smiled, his hand brushing my cheek gently. “We’ve been through a lot, Andrea. It’s time we take care of ourselves, too. We can’t pour from an empty cup.”

I nodded, feeling the weight of his words. He was right. We had been so focused on Anthony, on the changes in our lives, that we had forgotten to nurture the bond between us. The bond that had been tested and stretched thin. But it was still there, still strong enough to rebuild.

“I just—” I began, but my voice faltered. I wasn’t sure how to express the mix of emotions that flooded me. Relief, guilt, desire… confusion.

Doc reached out, taking my hand. “You don’t have to explain anything. We’re doing this for us, for our family. It’s not selfish.”

I took a deep breath and smiled, the tension in my shoulders easing. “Okay. Let’s do this.”


Later that night

The house was quiet, save for the distant hum of the baby monitor. The world outside seemed to disappear as we climbed into bed together, the room now fully our own.

Doc’s fingers brushed against my skin, and I couldn’t help but shiver. There was something about the stillness, the absence of interruptions, that made everything feel different. More intense. More real.

We hadn’t had this kind of privacy in so long. It felt like we were rediscovering each other, taking slow steps back into the space we had once shared so freely. His lips found mine, soft and slow at first, as if savoring the quiet intimacy of the moment.

“Are you sure?” he murmured against my lips, his voice low and filled with something I couldn’t quite place. Desire? Worry?

I nodded, pulling him closer. “I’m sure.”

And in that moment, everything felt right again. We weren’t just parents—we were partners, reclaiming the intimacy we had been too afraid to ask for. Every touch, every kiss, every slow movement was a reminder of who we were before everything had changed. The vulnerability between us was palpable, raw, but beautiful.

As the night unfolded, we found our rhythm again, letting go of the barriers we had built, allowing ourselves the space to explore not just our bodies, but our connection. It was different now, deeper, more tender. But it was ours.


Doc's POV

I didn’t know what to expect when we first discussed hiring the nannies. It felt like an impossible thing—handing over the care of Anthony for a few hours, even if it was just during the night. But I also knew that Andrea and I needed this. We needed time to breathe, to reconnect in ways we hadn’t been able to.

When she finally looked at me, her eyes full of doubt and longing, I knew it was time. She was scared, and I understood why. She was still healing, still unsure of where we stood in all this chaos. But I wasn’t going anywhere. I wouldn’t let her go through this alone.

“Tonight is just for us,” I whispered as we climbed into bed. “No worries, no expectations. Just us.”

She nodded, her hand slipping into mine. I could feel her body relax against mine, and I allowed myself to do the same. For the first time in a long time, I didn’t feel like I was constantly on edge, waiting for the next thing to go wrong.

As our bodies moved together, I couldn’t help but marvel at how far we had come. This wasn’t just about sex or passion. It was about rebuilding trust, rebuilding us. And as we finally came together in a union that was raw and real, I felt a sense of peace I hadn’t known in months.

This was the beginning of something new, something fragile but strong. And I was ready for whatever came next.

 

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